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Abigail's Newsletter |
March 4, 1999 |
| Living in today's world requires work. Sometimes work is a job we do to
earn a living, sometimes it is just taking care of the loved ones around us, and the
things we own. Our attitude toward work is evident to others, even when we are not aware
of it ourselves. We are responsible for our attitude, and the quality of our work. God is
always working in us and through us. And we always have work to do. God wants us to work
cheerfully. He is available to share our burden. |
We should always be ready to share the burden with our husbands. Join with
him in good works. Support him in his job, and the work of the Lord. Together we can do so
much more than alone. We can lift one another up, and urge each other on to the finish. Relationships
take work. They do not happen by themselves. Much of the work in good relationships is
rewarding. But sometimes it takes self-sacrificing, on-going, high- intensive labor. |
"Lord, who may dwell in your sanctuary? Who may live on your holy
hill? He whose walk is blameless and who does what is righteous, who speaks the truth from
his heart and has no slander on his tongue, who does his neighbor no wrong and casts no
slur on his fellowman, who despises a vile man but honors those who fear the Lord, who
keeps his oath even when it hurts, who lends his money without usury and does not accept a
bribe against the innocent. He who does these things will never be shaken" Psalm 15 |
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March 10, 1999 |
God revealed his plan at the start of creation. God knew
it was not good for man to be alone, so he created woman, and brought her to Adam. God
made them from one flesh, and they are united together in marriage to become one flesh.
(Genesis 2:18,21-24) Although we are made from one flesh, men and women are very
different. These differences are physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual. They
know that the brains of boys and girls are different before they are even born. There are
also other differences as a result of being unique individuals, having original
personalities with distinctive experiences. This disparity brings excitement to the
marriage relationship. As the saying goes, "Variety is the spice of life." But
sometimes those same differences bring strife and dissonance. |
During courtship, many people enjoy meeting and spending time with someone
who is very different from themselves. There is an attraction to someone different from
yourself. That attraction can turn into conflict, because you do not think or act like
that other person. Remember why you were attracted to your mate before you were married.
Was that great quality about him now something that you find irritating? Look back at why
you were drawn together. Think about how you are able to do things together that neither
of you could do alone. Enjoy your differences, and learn how to make the most of them. It
may mean learning to communicate in a different way, trusting God to join you, or just
praying for God to change you - not your husband. |
We are different, thank God! Husbands and wives complement each other and
God planned it this way. "I am laid low in the dust; preserve my life according to
your word. I recounted my ways and you answered me; teach me your decrees. Let me
understand the teaching of your precepts; then I will meditate on your wonders. My soul is
weary with sorrow; strengthen me according to your word. Keep me from deceitful ways; be
gracious to me through your law. I have chosen the way of truth; I have set me heart on
your laws. I hold fast to your statutes, O Lord; do not let me be put to shame. I run in
the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free."
Psalm 119:25-32 |
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March 17, 1999 |
| All relationships take discipline to be successful. In a marriage it is
extremely important to have discipline in dealing with the every day emotions and work
necessary for a satisfying relationship. Both partners must be committed to dealing with
issues as they arise, especially emotions and conflicts, even when it may be painful. The
discomfort of dealing with it now will allow a more fulfilling relationship in the future,
beginning today. To make your marriage last, commit with your partner to not remain
angry with each other. Work on sharing your feelings, thoughts, and experiences every day,
or at least a few times a week. Take time to really listen to your husband. Listen to what
is behind his words, and share that with him, in order to make sure you are really hearing
him. |
Do not be fooled, it takes hard work. Work to find the time to spend with
one another, and sometimes painful work of sharing the deepest emotions, and being
vulnerable to your partner. The hard work pays off in a closer and more satisfying
relationship. It strengthens your marriage and enables you to be stronger as a couple. The
painful experiences in marriage need to be addressed, and the sooner these issues are
resolved, the more pleasure can be experienced. How much more will you enjoy time with
your husband if there is no bitterness, no hidden agenda. The pure love brings joy and
peace in your relationship, and happiness spreads into all you do together. Take time to
work through the difficulties now, and enjoy the fruits of that labor much sooner. |
"Do not boast about tomorrow, for you do not know
what a day may bring forth.
Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; someone else, and not your own lips.
Stone is heavy and sand a burden, but provocation by a fool is heavier than both.
Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy?
Better is open rebuke than hidden love.
Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.
He who is full loathes honey, but to the hungry even what is bitter tastes sweet."
Proverbs 27:1-7 |
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March 24, 1999 |
| How do you follow God? How do you love your husband? It is not only by
your actions, but in your inner being, with your soul, that matters most. The outward
appearance is not what God sees, but your heart. Is your heart right with God? Do you
desire to follow God's leading? He has a path for us to follow, starting with accepting
his gift of salvation. Then we change, starting on the inside. The Holy Spirit works
within us for quality and righteousness. As we grow in Christ, others see the change. |
Look into your heart, and follow God's leading as He works to bring about
the quality of perfect love and a gentle, quiet spirit within you. As your inner spirit
turns from evil ways toward God's word, your actions will follow. The Holy Spirit will
enable you, and guide you in the ways of righteousness. He will even help you to love your
husband with an unfailing love, in the image of His sacrificial love for you. Open your
heart to God, and He will open your heart to others, in His name. |
"Teach me, O Lord, to follow your decrees; then I will keep them to
the end. Give me understanding, and I will keep your law and obey it with all my heart.
Direct me in the path of your commands, for there I find delight. Turn my eyes away from
worthless things; preserve my life according to your word. Fulfill your promise to your
servant, so that you may be feared. Take away the disgrace I dread, for your laws are
good. How I long for your precepts! Preserve my life in your righteousness."
Psalm 119:33-40 |
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